Sent: Tuesday, 29 March 2016 7:29 p.m.
Subject: Letter to Ms Bennett
Dear Ms Bennett,
I saw you on the TVNZ news tonight and I’m extremely disturbed that you don’t understand why people want to kill you and cause you significant harm. You probably won’t believe me about this so please contact an independent psychiatrist to explain and validate what I am saying.
I am 50 years old and destitute after I was raped sodomised, person was found not guilty even when he admitted it and then I was subjected to the past 14 years of degrading abuse, persecution and criminal neglect. I was at university when I was mentally injured, I tried to return but failed, I begged ACC for help but was refused even though education is covered under law and it is ACCs responsibility to return me as near as possible to my pre-injury life. I also owned a franchise business which I lost because I couldn’t continue and ACC again were refusing to support me or provide me the treatment care and rehabilitation I was entitled to under the law.
I owned a house from when I was 24 until I was 36, now I am 51 and destitute thanks to ACC and the NZ government. I have been rotting on welfare for 14 years begging for the help I knew I needed and was entitled to under the law – I was studying law before I was hurt and have reports saying I am intelligent. I have tried to heal myself and return to university several times but failed, mostly because of my inhuman living situation – which includes unstable unsafe housing and having to repeatedly move. I have never lived in a state house, there are no state houses in the Wairarapa and I never got the help I needed for my children and I to make it into state housing of any kind.
I have been forced to move repeatedly and had some of the most revolting landlords, two years ago I was forced to move 4 times in one year. I already have a stress disorder and having to move is the most stressful thing you can do so I become highly suicidal and very dysfunctional when it happens – I live in constant fear of having to move. Also in the time since I was hurt I have been forced – due to poverty -to live with 9 different people other than my children (who are awesome and have now left home and both work) Only one of the people was a nice person. The others ALL stole from me, victimized me and took advantage of me due to my disability, two of them attempted suicide – the first tried to hang himself twice in our garage, smashed up our house (one of my daughters was living with me then) and then stalked us for months.
The other took a handful of pills was in intensive care for 3 days and was allowed home on day four with no mental health support, no mental health worker, couldn’t even see her psychiatrist for four weeks. Her partner and I were completely shocked, we had no say in it and mental health knew how unwell I was. When she came home it was horrendous, even her family sent their pre-school children around to be cared for over the weekend. I was so petrified for their wellbeing, although I had gone away myself to a friends back in Wairarapa to try and deal with what happened, I came back to protect the children. There is more to this story but I can’t talk about it as it still traumatises me now. At the time I was begging ACC for my care to be reinstated from 2009 as required after winning two reviews and extremely unwell myself, highly suicidal and having several welfare checks from police after government agencies who were supposed to be helping me refused and were concerned for my welfare.
If I had the opportunity like you to buy a home I would never have had to go through all of that, all the money I have been forced to spend and pay back to WINZ for moving expenses, it would be over $10,000 – all while rotting on welfare – I now rot on invalids benefit. I hate not working so much I wish I was dead every day.
I had WINZ rip me off when I took in a young boarder under some scheme, he was extremely strange and ripped me off $250. I was assured by government agencies he was a good boy, he was not, he was nothing like my girls, who are admired by all people they work for and parents of friends. This email gives you authority to look at my WINZ file – my case manager Tina Hemi is awesome and understands, she gets angry I cannot get my ACC care reinstated and she knows how unwell I get when I am extremely broke, have dangerous or abusive people living with me and or have to move.
I find WINZ so degrading after so many years I start ticking, shaking and crying when I go there. I used to stand outside or I would be sick and have a panic attack,
Tina would come outside and get me. I can’t stand outside any longer and do not go to WINZ anymore because there are security guards and they would not understand my extremely traumatised behaviour. I rock backwards and forwards, click my fingers and become highly dysfunctional. I took a friend their recently and waited outside I watched two young security guards demanding every visitor tell them why they were there and not let them in until they did – it was sickening. WINZ is already the most degrading place on the planet and putting in those guards has made people even more degraded. You did that.
After your degrading reforms in 2013 and after border smashed up our house and tried to hang himself in the garage I was so traumatised I started having extreme visions of a gun in my mouth going off and blowing the back of my head off. They got so bad it was almost 10 times an hour for several days, I would sit and rock backwards and forwards on my bed self-harming it was so bad. ACC, mental health, my doctor and others knew this was happening and refused to reinstate my care. I write music and poetry to cope so I wrote the song I Wish I Was Dead, its one of my best songs. Please see my website for a copy and check out the other poetry I have written about how bad it is to live in this revolting country after 30 yrs of neo-liberals advancing rich and persecuting poor (yes I know what persecution is). http://www.jrmurphypoet.com/2014/08/i-wish-i-was-dead-jr-murphy/
A year later John Tully was driven mad by these reforms and the lack of stable housing in his community that he flipped out and killed those two WINZ workers, this was your fault and Brendan Boyles fault, this was the fault of your reforms. A few days after the deaths I protested outside MSD in Wellington, I was abused for it, people in the building are so stupid and out of touch with reality that they couldn’t accept the truth of what I was singing, saying and chalking on the street.
Of course people want you to die, I want you to die and be harmed, that’s what I pray for almost every day and definitely every time I see you lying about the causes of abuse – blaming other people for domestic and child abuse – when from my extensive and dedicated study over the past 14 years – because when you don’t work and are intelligent you have to do something – it is the fault of inequality and neo-liberal political economic and social policies that has been the greatest cause of abuse in our country. We didn’t have this much abuse, violence, addiction, mental injury, mental illness and suicide prior to 1980s neo-liberal cuts. Where rich were advanced and disabled poor were persecuted.
I want you to suffer like I am suffering because of your violent abusive destructive policies and changes – you must know that, professional people must tell you that.
Another reason I despise you and wish the worst sort of violence against you is because I have tried repeatedly to return to university and failed thanks to ACC and others. I now have a $7000 debt after failing again last year – mostly because I became highly suicidal due to my unstable living situation and ACC continuing to refuse to reinstate my care, even when the ACC case manager phoned me personally and told me it would be reinstated as it was in 2009 – then several months later refused to do it. They still refuse to do it. You had the TIA, I can’t get that, now I’m 51 there is no point in returning to university or getting any education as I won’t be able to pay it off – I will have to live destitute and most likely end up homeless when I am old. I have to live like a student with strangers in my home, with the constant threat of a rent increase or having to move.
I can’t talk about this any longer I’m becoming suicidal and will have to go and self-harm, Wairarapa has the highest rate of self-harm in New Zealand, because mental health services here are run by people who are extremely mentally disturbed and hate women.
Feel free to check out my facebook page and website and youtube channel /jrmurphypoet – I will leave a few messages for you in the next few days. Just so people know why you are the most hated woman of my generation – with Ruth Richardson close behind. You have destroyed me, violated my rights and persecuted me while you make so much money – you have done it to thousands of people – you make everything so degrading, that is what you are good at.
Please advise if you now understand why you are so hated, why all your government are so hated, you are the cause of NZs violence, you create an inhuman environment for people to live in and you know it. I hope and pray you and those around you get the karma you deserve considering the pain and suffering you cause to disabled innocent vulnerable people in New Zealand. You fail to provide the necessaries of life outlined in Maslows Heirachy of needs as required under ACC, health, disability, criminal, imperial, human rights and bill of rights laws. You are as bad as Hitler, that is why people hate you and want you dead.
Just thought you needed to know, just in case you weren’t corrupt and are just ignorant, brainwashed and naïve. Can you please write to me through snail mail to confirm you received this email because I believe 1000s of emails like mine are kept from you. I phoned your office today and said much of the things I have said here, the young woman on the phone didn’t believe me either, but its true – don’t you ever meet with the people who complain or you persecute?
Kia kaha to us all
Civil Society Actor