I wish I was an angel
So this fear and pain would go away
I wish I was an angel
And my life would end today
I wish I was an angel
I wish I was an angel
So this fear and pain would go away
I wish I was an angel
And my life would end today
If I was Jacinda first thing I’d do
Is make hospital parking for me and you
Then I’d take a legal stick
Be there for all thin and think
All newbies I would then make
For 18 years to vote they’d wait
Maslow’s pyramid would be my guide
Our first two laws would be applied
I’d learn from the history of war
Won’t trust the rich, make no man poor
Would kick corporations to the kerb
We’ve all had enough of their greed & blurb
We’d share justly what there is
And act rightly for the kids
Give the media tough sets of rules
For making most of us into fools
This poem could go on for ages
Refuse, rewrite cruel history pages
But that is for another day
Now give me a guitar to play
This explains why ACC are illegally denying me care – they don’t want to pay for housing for abuse victims because of all the business corporations being propped up with their investments. Sick murderers!
WINZ already know this, they know exactly why I am unwell and how desperately I want to work. I sent this email after something the woman at WINZ said the other day about me trying to get a flatmate. Like it was a good comment to put on my file – the fact I can’t get health care or services OR EVEN A DOCTOR so I can return to work and get health care is completely ignored.
Yet again I was forced to fill out yet another form which I find extremely distressing because I know I should not be on welfare and I know I would not be on welfare if I could get health care I am entitled to and need after winning two ACC reviews in 2010/11.
The behaviour of your staff was unprofessional, manipulative and what is called GASLIGHTING – a technique abusers use to destabilise and invalidate their victims. The way those two women came up to me concerned I was crying – which I was trying to stop because I was terrified I was going to get trespassed and all those things I was threatened in the letter Michele sent to me re self-harming. I was going to tell them not to worry there was nothing they could do. Instead a callous cruel abuser staff member came up and told them it was nothing to do with them and THEY WOULD HANDLE ME.
You see unlike normal human beings that don’t work for WINZ or any government organisation purposely persecuting disabled abused poor people – we see someone GENUINELY UPSET AND FREAKING OUT like I was and we want to hug them, care for them and do whatever we can to stop the harm. The people at WINZ have obviously been trained to be psychopathic abusers, to not engage at all in the harm they were causing. So have the staff who answered my complaint about the insulting letter regarding my 4th request for food? in 12 months – SINCE MY RENT WENT UP $70. The Indian woman – who was extremely culturally offensive, elitst and insulting with her apology saying she was sorry for my INCONVENIENCE. What you did to me was abusive, insulting, humiliating, traumatising, illegal, punitive and of course disrespectful – not inconvenient.
I WANT PUT ON MY FILE I DESPERATELY WANT TO WORK AND CHANGE MY SITUATION BUT I CANNOT – THAT IS NOT MY FAULT.
I WANT IT PUT ON MY FILE THAT OF COURSE I AM TRYING TO FIND A FLATMATE THAT WON’T STEAL FROM ME, TERRORISE ME, EXPLOIT ME & MY DISABILITY, PAY THEIR HALF, DO THEIR HALF OF CHORES, NOT BRING DANGEROUS PEOPLE TO MY HOUSE. I CAN’T LIVE WITH DIGNITY WITHOUT HAVING A FLATMATE HERE – THAT I CANNOT GET ONE IS NOT MY FAULT. Every time I put the room on trademe, or facebook or note up at supermarket I get really dangerous men and women applying which terrifies me as I really don’t want to be raped against, or terrorised and stolen from again either. I WOULD BE OK WITH A DISABLED FLATMATE, SO LONG AS I WASN’T EXPECTED TO BE THE ONE TO LOOK AFTER THEM BECAUSE THE GOVERNMENT ILLEGALLY REFUSED TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I keep asking the few people I know if they know of anybody who wants somewhere to live that is suitable, but either the people they know are too dangerous and they wouldn’t recommend them or most want housing for families and I am only allowed one other person at my rental according to the tenancy – plus this property is far too dangerous for children.
I am also desperately trying to earn some money to supplement my income, I keep making things to sell at the market, but because I am so poor, so unwell and so unsupported I can’t afford to get a $ float together in order to go to market, I can’t afford to take my car up there. Also I am so isolated and so terrified of PEOPLE because of what police, mental health, WinZ etc people are doing to me I become terrified of everybody. I have ideas for selling merchandise etc related to my art, music and poetry, but I can’t afford the money to get some T shirts made. I got a pile of NICE poetry made and printed that I could sell at shops, Wairarapa poetry people love but I can’t get the money together to market it properly and local shops are not interested in any local product if it isn’t.
My poetry would be great to be sold to tourists and I went to see Cobblestones a few weeks ago about how to do that and see what else they had for sale. Although I had a great discussion with the manager there and she wants some of my poetry BECAUSE OF MY MENTAL HEALTH I was unable to follow this up – if I had the treatment care rehab, home, Occupational Therapist and mental health worker I am entitled to under ACC then I would have the support I need to sell my work and participate in society.
I was a business women before I was hurt, I would still be one if I had received the ACC care I am entitled to.
I am always looking for a part-time job, except as you know I have phobias about going for an interview related to the not guilty verdict of my rapist and the destroying of my life.
One of the reasons I am so unwell and want to kill myself is I don’t work – everything I do with my protesting and begging for services I know I am entitled to IS BECAUSE I WANT TO WORK. If I don’t work people hate me, family hate me and ashamed of me, people in the community hate you, people who work hate you, you are subjected to continuous bigotry and even violence because you don’t work. If you don’t work people who do have money and work often take advantage of you,
Also it is extremely traumatising for me to have to go through why I need a food grant when I have bulimia and am so humiliated I don’t want to say to the person on the phone. Sometimes when I am extremely stressed (usually over police violence and persecution) I use this to cope – ACC, mental health and others have known that for years and refused to provide me any eating disorder support services EVER! People do not understand bulimia and are extremely bigoted, because they believe I HAVE CHOICES when I do this – WHICH OF COURSE I DO NOT! Or I wouldn’t do it, would I, because I barely have enough to survive now.
Please put on my file that I am bulimic so I don’t have to explain it to people who are ignorant insulting degrading bigots on the phone.
I find going to the food bank way to distressing, degrading and terrifying than asking WINZ for a food grant occasionally. but I have managed to find someone who can go for me, not that I like asking him one bit. However the food bank parcels are full of carbohydrates and food I can’t have in my house or I eat all of it at once – like packets of biscuits etc. There is no real meat or vegetables – which is food. The things are very high in fat & sugar which is really bad for me. I have to give away most of the stuff I get because I have diabetes coming on and I just can’t have nice carbohydrate food in the house. Plus I’m still living on mainly toast/bread that is enough carbs and makes be extremely fat and disgusting which all people with jobs and money hate as well. After reading a news item last week I realise it is the high carbohydrate diet I am forced to eat due to poverty that makes me fat.
I grow a few salad veges and herbs but am always wary of putting very little of my money into my garden as if the landlord wanted me to leave it would be a waste and I would be extremely distraught leaving my garden – which has happened to me in the past. I don’t have a secure tenancy & can be kicked out with six weeks notice if they want a family member to move in – which has happened to several friends of mine. Our government and housing market is now so perverted houses are being put in the hands of wealthy families, while depriving people who don’t have wealthy families and multiple rentals. I don’t have any family that can afford it or that would help me out, my wealthy family don’t want anything to do with me or any other poor person. My own brother told me if my life was so hard I should kill myself a few weeks ago.
If there is anything you can do to get me help to get someone safe as a flatmate, help me fill out forms or access disability funding for my business ideas etc please contact me urgently.
I just received this response from a complaint about Judge Barbara Morris. Loved the final sentence about how I will be outraged, I way past that point with these corrupt neo-liberal terrorist elites. Here is his letter, which I could not copy from as it was protected on the email and my response.
20 November 2019
PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL
Ms J R
Dear Ms R
Complaint about Judge Morris
“…made an extremely inappropriate comment about me receiving counselling…..”
JUDICIAL CONDUCT COMMISSIONER
My response to this self-righteous elitist bigot is as follows
It is never a good morning
No Mr Ritchie it has not moved on it has become even more incredibly INSANE, abusive and unjust.
In fact your response was interestingly timed as I was about to make another complaint about Judge Morris. And sent a letter to your office regarding my feelings around my situation recently. Of course I am annoyed, but you have actually achieved what my other point of the complaint was if I failed. You have made sure I have exhausted yet another avenue to get justice, which makes me eligible to help from United Nations and International Court.
Last week I was labelled insane and unfit to stand trial on the basis of two inaccurate, bias, corrupt and illegal psychiatric reports. I sacked my lawyer who had become insulting, bigoted and misogynist, was refused another one. According to Legal Aid it would be not be in the interests of justice to provide me a lawyer. Saying I got rid of my last 2 lawyers inappropriate which is not true and they know it. 1st lawyer didn’t even work in Wairarapa and never heard of me 2 days before court when I phoned him. 2nd lawyer there was a conflict of interest we both agreed made him unsuitable. They said my lawyer last year was unfairly dismissed which is not true, my lawyer Susie Barnes was great – just way out of her league when Meredith Connell, on behalf of ACC, got involved and perverted justice in my criminal case.
The thing is, its not the judge that is the real problem and injustice here, is it. Elephant in the room is successive neo-liberal directed governments created this systemic/procedural injustice against people with stress disorders as a result of abuse and neglect (govt neglect mostly). As Martyn Luther King said “Never forget everything Hitler did in Germany was legal.” (in 1963 while in Birmingham Jail USA). It is quite obvious to me the justice system and mental health laws have been perverted to oppress poor disabled people like myself and profit unscrupulous authoritarian people. I am assuming from a lot of international media discussion this is due to corruption of our governments by pharmaceutical companies, this is the main reason for my situation. I refuse medication on religious and ethical grounds – always have. I know what I need to be safe enough to recover from my mental injury and move on with my life – that is all I have tried to do since I was a victim of crime in 2002.
That I (and others I have met) have been subjected to such punitive use of the police, health and justice systems trying to stop me getting the care victims need is abhorrent and nonsensical to me. I see on a local mental health and addiction service provider website there are 6-8 week courses for alcoholics and junkies, gamblers – but as I don’t do those things I am ineligible. In fact many of the people that receive these services are those who cause 80% of the harm to mentally injured disabled people in the bottom poorest (most disenfranchised, dysfunctional, disliked) 20% of society.
Now you have this information I feel it is your obligation as a senior judicial official to ensure my legal needs are met and this nightmare is ended sooner rather than later, so I can get on with my life. Free from oppression and with the professional treatment care rehabilitation and safe stable culturally appropriate home in my community as required by New Zealand and international UN treaties.
I will continue to try and get my art, music, suicide/abuse/trauma treatment services, political ideas, human rights, disabled rights, civil rights and democracy ideas into my community. Alhough I am terrified, I will continue to do my graffiti art and posters around my area when I have the courage. I will also continue to try and get services that police are now demanding are under compulsory treatment order. Which still blows my mind when all I have done is protest because I wasn’t getting services they said were available and I was incapable of working with providers who had already failed me so badly I almost committed suicide. And the English police officer prosecuting me, laughing at what was happening, that was just disturbed. Please refer to my youtube channel about what I was subjected to
Please share this video so Jacinda sees it. Police monitor my YouTube. Leave some comments for them if you support what I do, and understand why I get so angry. Show you appreciate i am not violent, use chalk posters art and care passionately about issue of sexual abuse & suicide also i have solutions will work & people entitled to.
I have also been trespassed from the court to stop me chalking outside, which I am legally allowed to do if I wasn’t trespassed. Even when they said I could come to court they tried to stop me chalking beforehand. I kept telling them I had won a court case that said I could protest on any public property so long as I was quiet – which chalking is, unless someone comes up and tried to stop me and incite me to swearing and violence. Thankfully I have a lot of experience with overzealous poorly trained security and police who don’t know Bill Of Rights and other laws as well as I do.
At the moment I am planning my treatment and rehabilitation, they are demanding I receive compulsorily – LOL, LOL, LOL. Or if they are corrupt and have left me without services just to terrorise me and the community, then they will find a corrupt psychiatrist who demands I take medication. Question is how do I protect myself against them illegally (gross violation of UN Declaration on Human Rights) forcing me to take medication? I would like you advice on this?
My other problem is I have not worked out how to get my injustice regarding ACC, health care, police and others into the High Court. If I could take a civil action in the high court under Legal Aid (who hate me) then I believe this entire situation would be resolved, I have wanted to do this for over 17 years. I would receive the professional health care and stability in my housing situation that is essential to me not ‘going tourettes’ when I am challenging people in authority, in the community causing harm to me and others. It is also essential to my recovery and being able to move on. These tourettes moments, which are documented by a previous psychiatrist I saw multiple times are an impairment related to my disability and the extreme stress I am under.
I would appreciate your comments and advice on my situation in the framework of requirements under Imperial Law enactment of the Magna Carta. As this does not appear to be something the District Court is capable of applying. A judge is there to adjudicate between two opposing factions, I have been denied that most basic legal right by being labelled insane – from what I have told you above it is pretty obvious it is not me who is insane. This will also be obvious to Nils Melzer and other UN officials regarding complaints I intend to make.
Judge Morris’ comments about psychotropic medication reinforces my case for criminal negligence and discrimination on the basis of my disability, religious and ethical beliefs. Currently I am quite incapable and to poor to conduct a case of such magnitude and significance in our neo-liberal controlled country. With the care police are demanding I forcibly receive (which is truly ridiculous) hopefully my high level of executive functioning will return. I have always said, “I just want my life back.”
I will never stop protesting and being a Civil Society Actor in the area of mental health services and suicide for victims of trauma and crime until our government and society do what they say they do. What I was taught in my disability, rehabilitation and health 101 papers at Massey. Other people who are being harmed don’t have the knowledge, experience and understanding I do to articulate in a more legal and professional way what is happening and how oppressed we are. Also how it adversely affects our behaviour which is exploited throughout our unjust, undemocratic neo-liberal society.
I look forward to your response, although I would rather meet with you in person to discuss this. I find this personal detachment between those in power and those oppressed is a significant cause of why nothing is being done to stop the suicide and violence people pushed to breaking point are expressing. There is no way my family and people I am peers with who are wealthy (I no longer associate with) would agree to the situation I am in. None of my current friends who know who I am and what I fight for agree at all, but are too unwell and too afraid to support me. In fact nobody I meet protesting disagrees with what I am saying. Which makes the actions of police extremely bizarre. If all of those people wanting me prosecuted knew the situation about my decade long fight for reinstatement of my care by ACC, which includes $10,000 in unpaid Independence they are illegally withholding – I am sure they would not want police to prosecute me. Police, Labour Party, Bell Gully and DHB have no excuses except corruption, criminal negligence and oppression, as they caused this situation.
Finally, we are No 1 in OECD for youth suicide (No 5 for suicide), women self-harming, domestic/flatmate violence and homelessness, everything I am fighting for and passionately legally protesting about is to address this appalling desperate situation. How can I be insane and those doing it not? Please refer to Prof Philip Zimbardo’s work on evil and abuses of power.
I was going to write more about the inaccuracies in your report but I really feel there is no point after doing some research on you. It is quite obvious you have the mentality of a ruling elite BOOMER instrumental in the persecution of (purposely impoverished) disabled mentally injured abuse victims like myself. You also feel no quilt or responsibility whatsoever for the 10,000s abused neglected women children and men the neo-liberal controlled judiciary illegally and unjustly terrorise, persecute, drive to suicide and crime. Or the same number who are denied Legal Aid and appropriately qualified and resourced lawyers (as Justice Winkleman has pointed out several times now). Other than that all I have to say is #OK BOOMER! Or as Martyn Bradbury called it more accurately #OK RULING ELITE – which of course is you.
You are a vile corrupt evil man and people like you will need to be removed from your position of power before we have peace between rich and poor again. Purposely driving children to suicide, women to self-harm, men to violence and crime and using immigrants to drive disabled and poor from their homes are terrorist acts of cruel and immoral fascists – which you and your ruling elites friends are. I know this, you now know this, I will make sure as many people as possible know it as well.
The life of privilege you have lived and the suffering you have caused is an abomination of neo-liberal extremism that will never be forgotten by me and I think you are in fact so incredibly cruel and corrupt I will write a poem about you and include it in the next edition of my book, which will be submitted to the National Library of New Zealand. This is to make sure what has happened to me and so many others is recorded for prosperity, so everybody knows the truth, not just the public narrative propaganda we are all subjected to.
When neo-liberal terrorists are overthrown and I am part of a new era of justice, equality and sustainability I will make sure you are removed from any control or judgement of any kind over people. Personally I feel people like yourself should be forced to relinquish all the proceeds of your years of crimes against poor in this country, left with only a modest house in a modest suburb (actually I believe we will eventually start holding the cruellest neo-liberals to account just as they are still doing with NAZI murderers. Everything else should be seized and returned back to the taxpayers you failed and illegally oppressed.
Other than that I wish you all the karma and judgement any higher power that does exist chooses to unleash on you for your crimes against humanity in New Zealand. From the darklands of this neo-liberal nightmare it is not me who is insane it is you and your ruling class friends. The elites that everybody is working out are the ones to hate and fight against, not each other which you currently incite.
I don’t hate you for this decision, I hate you for who you are and what you have done to destroy democracy, rule of law and government in this country in your lifetime. I was 5 yrs old when you became a lawyer, I am now 55, you destroyed my life since 2002 which is when I first started trying to get a lawyer I was entitled to and finally worked out was non-existent to a poor disabled abused women like myself. You would have known me from your days perverting justice for poor at Law Society. The #metoo movement in Wellington proved without doubt the levels of toxic immoral abuses of power against women that male lawyers appear to think their birthright. First you abuse women, then you deny abused women the treatment care rehab homes and justice they are entitled to under law. I personally think those who deprive abuse victims of their entitlements and rights are worse than any rapist, child molester and disgusting filthy pervert – you not only deprive them of a decent life, you often deprive their children, families and those around them.
You are a disgusting immoral corrupt elitist bigot and hopefully the bible is true and you go to hell where you definitely belong. EAT THE RICH!
I was shocked at reading this – wealthy neo-liberal terrorist elites are now gloating about the fact there is 4% unemployment 200,000, which apparently proves to this unshaven hipster elitist bigot that EVERYBODY is in a good job and should get a pay rise. That does not count all of those with disabilities who desperately want and need work which is 20% of our population 1,000,000 according to the government.
They not even hiding the fact any longer that the government is purposely creating work because the private sector is a neo-liberal terrorist failure for our society and the planet.
CLICKBAIT from HATE Inc (google Matt Taibbi).
On 22 October I sacked my lawyer citing irreconcilable differences after he insulted me and discriminated against me multiple times. The final straw were two conversations where he asked me repeatedly what health care I wanted, firstly not allowing me to answer, then when I started to explain my ACC rehab plan from 2009 he told me it was meaningless. He then started repeating the same thing about what care I wanted over and over again, one of the times he did it very slowly. There is something seriously wrong with the man and I refuse to deal with him, also given my severe stress disorder I no longer trusted him. He also called me things that were sexually derogatory in nature and extremely offensive to any woman my age.
I sent WGNCriminallegalAid all the correspondence between me and the lawyer to prove my case as I have had serious issues with in the past. Although I emailed the complaint they have refused to send me the legal aid decision electronically, they sent it by mail so I have had to type it out to post it here. Firstly my response to their decision letter. then you can see their decision letter which will shock you.
Last time they refused me legal aid for this current case that is now almost two years old, I was not quick enough – because I was so unwell and did not know what to do that I missed the 10 day deadline. This time the letter dated 5 November arrived at my home on 10 November so I only have 5 days to get it done. These complaints are very distressing – mostly because I know I will be ignored but also because of the gross injustice I am being subjected to just for wanting my ACC care reinstated after winning two reviews nine years ago.
11 November 2019
I disagree with the decision to withdraw legal aid and not provide another lawyer and want it reviewed by someone who isn’t corrupt for the following reasons.
As Jock Blathwayt and I are no longer in this legally conflicting situation, if you want to reassign Jock that is fine with me. It is not me who the problem here, it is corrupted Legal Aid Services and the appalling disrespectful behaviour of your staff and lawyers like Alisdair Ross who specialise in denigrating victims of abuse with mental health issues.
Still horrified you stated in your letter that the first lawyer was forced to withdraw or dismissed by me when you know from previous complaints he didn’t work in Wairarapa.
Civil Society Activist
On behalf of the Legal Services Commissioner
5 November 2019
Ms J R
(for enquiries: Kathryn Ross 0800 253 425)
Legal aid no: (which I won’t give you
Lawyer : (which I will give you if you want me to)
Your Case: Fail to answer bail: other acts/statues; Wilful Damage, Other charges < 6 mths x2
Dear Ms J R
About your legal aid
On behalf of the Commissioner, we write in response to your numerous emails requesting us to reassign this matter from Alisdair Ross to a new lawyer. We have considered your request and now respond as follows:
2.1 The 2 lawyers who have represented you are competent and experienced. They have been dismissed by you, or been forced to withdraw, for reasons which have no bearing on their competence or skill.
2.2 The Commissioner’s policy on applicants (such as yourself) requesting a change of lawyer is clear. You have previously been made aware of this policy.
2.3 Exceptional circumstances do not exist here which justify us granting you another lawyer. Any breakdown in professional relationship in this case has been caused by your behaviour towards previous lawyers.
2.4 This is not the first matter in which you have caused your relationship with lawyers to break down. We refer, for example, to legal aid file 18866786 which concerned a wilful damage charge you faced last year. (Note from me: I had a great lawyer, Suzie Barnes, we lost the case and the two officers who violently assaulted me and threatened me with worse lied in court – but Suzie was still a good lawyer, just way out of her depth. Especially when ACC lawyers Meredith Connell threatened a judicial review that would taken months if she kept asking for the REAL NAME (they give false names) of my ACC case manager to be subpoenaed as a witness to prove she contacted me by phone and promised me my care would be reinstated. When Suzie asked for CEO of ACC instead, the big guns really came out. Suzie is not part of a huge legal company like Meredith Connell, she could not defend me. There were also other perversions of justice. As a result of losing this case I threw red washable poster paint on the white ribbon banner inside Masterton police station that said SPEAK OUT AGAINST VIOLENCE TOWARDS WOMEN and left a piece of art as well.
2.5 We refer to Cant v R (2013) NZCA 513, Pitiroi v Police (CRI-2012-463-38), and Pointon v Police (2013) NZHC 2352. These cases establish the fact a defendant is not legally represented does not necessarily mount to a miscarriage of justice, or a breach of the New Zealand Bill of Rights Act (BORA). (NOTE: I could not find these cases on any legal database.)
2.6 You have had ample opportunity and been given the right (more than once), to receive legal assistance without cost, as provided by s 24(f) of BORA. However the Supreme Court noted in R v Condon (2006) NZSC 62: “…. If the accused…. Is rightly refused legal aid….. there will have been no breach of the s 24 (BORA) rights.” (NOTE: Found this case and it doesn’t apply to my case at all.)
2.7 Here, it is reiterated, you have been given reasonable opportunity of legal representation twice. It cannot be argued unfairness accrues to you, based on this ground.
2.8 We have no confidence, if we assigned you a third lawyer, your behaviour towards that lawyer would be different from your behaviour towards your previous lawyers. (NOTE: What behaviour, last few lawyers been OK, just not Alisdair Ross.)
3.10 S 3 of the Act imposes a duty on the Commissioner to deliver legal aid efficiently and effectively. Given the above circumstances, it would be neither efficient nor effective for us to assign a third lawyer to act for you, or for aid to continue.
2.S 31(2) of the Act requires us to give you a reasonable opportunity to make submissions about why aid should not be withdrawn. Accordingly we will give you 10 working days from the date of this letter to make these submissions which, once received, will be considered by us. (NOTE: So if they weren’t forced by law to listen to reasons for not withdrawing legal aid then they would just ignore me anyway. Oh boy do these people hate poor people!)
We have written to your lawyer about this decision.
If you wish to discuss this further, talk to your lawyer or contact Kathryn Ross on 0800 2 LEGAL AID (0800 253 425) or by email WGNCriminallegalaid@justice.govt.nz
Yours sincerely (lol shd have been faithfully – no sincerity in this letter)
If you disagree with the decision made you may apply for a reconsideration using the reconsideration form on our website or calling Kathryn Ross………..
(I phoned and was told just to send an email).
This is the first time I have read the document properly and I found a whole heap of other BS I never saw before. Like my lawyer last year Susie Barnes was a good lawyer, just way out of her depth and resources. The lawyer I have had in the past have been OK, they all got me off vast majority of my charges – I only been convicted of 3 things – Wilful trespass of Law Society for going there and refusing to leave until I got a lawyer – graffiti a few years ago and wilful damage last year. I have been charged with DOZENS OF CRIMES, MULTIPLE TIMES – most of the charges never even ended up in court because police would drop the charges after three months, just before it got to a serious court sitting. Gee I wonder why!
I had to represent myself – I was capable of it then – against DHB wilfil trespass charges for a legal protest I did and I won – the case was so bad and their witness the security guard had never been told about BORA and the rights of people to protest on public property. I asked for compensation for being put through that court case unnecessarily – I was insulted, degraded and ridiculed by the CEO at the time for even asking.
Anyway, must get back to Criminal Legal Aid and add to my complaint above – I HAVE A LOT MORE TO FKN SAY NOW. WTF are these people on?? Lawyers don’t like me for my protests about wanting me and other mentally injured suicidal abuse victims – mostly women – to get the professional ACC treatment care rehabilitation and homes we are entitled to under NZ law. Mmmmm the legal profession – terrorising a victim of sexual abuse who asking for health care they entitled to – now why would they possibly do that – ewwwwww. Do you think Kathryn Ross might be these abusers in the system’s madam – just like that woman did for Geoffrey Epstein. Ewwwww
Below are more emails I have sent to Wellington Criminal Legal Aid, I post them to show people what goes on, validate if its happening to them and to give people knowledge of how they might approach something similar.
I have just read your decision thoroughly – I was too traumatised and unwell by what I had read earlier to do it. I see I have until the 19 November before the 10 days is up to provide the information necessary for you to consider. I have found several other things you have said that have me in shock, especially about lawyers, my lawyer Suzie Barnes was great, just way out of her depth. She still says hi to me in the street and has told me how deeply distressed she is that she cannot represent me due to her lack of resources and the horrendous injustices I am up against at the hands of very powerful cruel corrupt people. Injustices all people with mental health issues are experiencing at the moment according to the United Nations human rights reports I have seen and been involved in as a Civil Society Actor.
Please advise me urgently the names of these PREVIOUS LAWYERS where there was a breakdown of the relationship because of MY BEHAVIOUR towards them???? Please advise me what that breakdown was, you must have written record of it because I cannot recall many details after this long. You must have information on your file about what happened with each of these lawyers that is inaccurate and I am certainly not aware of. Did the bad ones I sacked for good reason say I was mean to them and lie about what happened – gee I wonder why they would do that?
Is this something to do with how all established lawyers accept #metoo sexual harassment and denigration of women as normal within your profession/industry, because that is what it feels like.
I think I might have sacked two really bad lawyers in the past nine years since I was forced to protest about being illegally denied ACC care, cause they were both really bad and didn’t know how to deal with my BORA related criminal charges for my NON-VIOLENT LEGAL CHALLENGES of people in power. I’m pretty sure I got better lawyers after those two and won both cases, one of them in the Appeal Court from what I remember of the years of fighting for health care and justice I am entitled to under NZ constitutional laws and signed ratified UN treaties. Please send me the details since you are using them to terrorise and pervert justice now – least you can do is full disclosure of these allegations and what I am up against so I can refute them.
Please advise how I look up the case law you quoted about what you are doing to me not being a violation of NZ BORA – which of course it is – I hadn’t actually thought of that, thanks for the tip. I didn’t realise I was supposed to be a qualified lawyer with access to case law in order to defend myself against the Legal Aid COMMISSIONER. I thought the point of disabled poor people getting legal aid and lawyers was because they didn’t know the law and particularly couldn’t access things like case law to defend themselves against very powerful abusers of power, right and justice. I am quite sure my situation is nothing like the case law you quoted, given the inaccurate and deceitful things you have referred to in your decision.
If you know I cannot access those case law examples of why you are not violating BORA through the internet then please provide copies of them in full.
Mmmm trying to think of those lawyers I had before Suzie Barnes? I remember one guy, who was a proud member of the National party, withdrew when I said I didn’t trust him, because I don’t trust anybody, I don’t know any badly abused and neglected abuse victim who does – I was in shock and very distressed he was allowed do that. You’ll have to remind me of any others, people with Complex PTSD who subjected to prolonged psychological, physical and economic trauma often forget things that aren’t important.
Sounds like you’ve all been discriminating against me, gossiping and illegally sharing information about me that isn’t even true. That must be why I have experienced such toxic hatred and bigotry from Legal Aid services – I could never understand why and what was going on. I would imagine cruel corrupt bigots within NZ police and mental health services would also have information you would be relying on, please provide anything like that as well. Is it any wonder at the UN Human Rights consultation process last year, the lecture theatre at Victoria of about 50 people, all but two were there about serious human rights abuses against people with mental health issues – just like me. Which it appears you are participating in with regards to me simply getting a lawyer.
From news reports and lawyers I have spoken to it appears to be more a case of lawyers choosing to do commercial and easy law for rich people that pays well, rather than actually uphold law and protect poor and disabled people from abuses of power.
I would also point out I have a serious life-threatening stress disorder with related communication impairments, especially when subjected to discrimination, degradation, insults and bigotry, as is the life of a many disabled people with Complex PTSD – as a result of sexual violence and criminal neglect. I have serious, well founded, trust issues and once someone loses that trust the professional relationship can break down – YOU WOULDN’T BE ANY DIFFERENT IF IT HAPPENED TO YOU. No rich person would have accepted what was said to me, they would have got another lawyer immediately – so why should a poor person be punished and have their legal aid illegally withheld.
So please consider my email yesterday just the beginning of my evidence – you will have received all of it by the 19 November, when you can put it all together and consider it – lol. I expect the rest of your file in the next few days so I can check it for accuracy.
Also I would like to comment that your letter was extremely litigious considering I am a disabled lay person citizen and you are a Commission, not a court. Perhaps my idea of transferring all commissions, tribunals etc back under our traditional legal system has more merit than I first thought.
Please provide the information requested above in the next two days so I can be sure to provide all the evidence you need, within your 10 day time limit, to make a right and just decision.
I can certainly feel the bigotry, hatred and evil of passive inaction many affluent people who work in justice, welfare and health exhibit towards disabled people like myself.
I can’t find Cant v R or Pointon v police or Pitiroi v police so far, please provide a link or copies of these cases.
I did find R v Condon – which has no relevance to my case whatsoever. My wanting to sack Alisdair Ross is to do with ongoing behaviour I didn’t like but put up with, but definitely could no longer cope with after his extremely bizarre bigoted insulting behaviour of recent phone conversations about me getting my ACC care reinstated and what that involved. Also about him making sexually inappropriate derogatory comments calling me a Cougar – ewwwww – which I had not done anything about, except tell him how bad it made me feel – which he did not acknowledge or apologise for. I felt it necessary to mention it after the phone calls as it was relevant and I should have made a formal complaint about it but was too scared I would end up with no lawyer and after the appalling treatment I had received from Legal Aid Services and Law Society in the past knew they would just abuse me for it. #metoo and kia kaha to all those innocent young women in the misogynist world of law.
EVERYBODY had been telling me for ages my criminal case had nothing to do with ACC illegally withholding health care and I even have a criminally corrupt psychiatric report to say I was delusional for even thinking my criminal case and civil rights abuses by ACC and others were related. So the discussion Alisdair and I were having wasn’t even related to my criminal case, it was related to what health care I needed, entitled to by law and wanted from ACC. Apparently ACC had a list of OTs to choose from and as soon as I made the decision my care would be reinstated after waiting nine years and winning two reviews. As they have said this at least three times before over past nine years and failed to do it I would only believe something like that unless it happened. ACC telling a lawyer (or ACC reviewer) they will do something doesn’t mean it will happen, ACC have told lots of people my care would be reinstated but it never did. Also I have been in regular contact with ACC begging for my care to be reinstated, they have never sent me a list of OTs to choose from. The one they guaranteed would reinstate my care last year refused to do it WITHOUT REASON – I made complaints, they were ignored.
My situation makes the Condon case irrelevant and that you quoted it, you corrupt! If you want to get really legal about it. I don’t blame the lawyer from withdrawing, I would have as well, this was a business deal gone wrong, nothing to do with politics or civil, disabled, human, economic social and cultural rights and violations of criminal law by police, ACC, Forensic Mental Health, DHB, etc WHICH MY CASE IS ABOUT. Thank you so much for the information though, its really interesting. I was at law school before I was raped and my life destroyed by ACC and those supposed to care for, rehabilitate and protect mentally injured victims of crime. It took me until 35 yrs old to work out what I wanted to be and it was all taken from me. I now live destitute and still fighting for ACC entitlements so I can heal, return to work and be able to live with dignity and in safety, now I am 54 I am not allowed a student loan. I also live with a $7,000 student debt from trying to get the qualifications to follow my talent and my passion.
Below is the database I searched with all the information you gave me about the case law you were relying on – they all came up NO SEARCH RESULTS.
I would have thought with all those numbers and details at least something would have come up. Do these cases even exist, are you that corrupt you make these things up to mislead and further oppress disabled oppressed #metoo victims of crime? I know there is a huge amount of evidence being presented by victims against Crown Law perverting justice in the current inquiry into abuse and torture in government institutions. Quoting Crown Law case in regards to a sexual abuse victim, fighting for treatment care rehabilitation and home they are entitled to in order to recover and return to as normal a life as possible under ACC and other laws, seems to me an even more evil crime against victims. What do you think?
I am due in court again on 18 November I will make sure to provide this information to the judge
6 November 2019
New Zealand Police
IPCA – independent haters of human sewage like me
It is with terror and self-harm that I am writing yet another complaint I know will be ignored, as every other complaint I have ever made has been and things have only got worse with regard to my treatment by Wairarapa police. I am so traumatised by what happened I desperately needed to talk to someone about my complaint so I phoned the number for Police HQ I got some other non-urgent number. They told me they were putting me through to a police complaints line, but they put me through to the main police line and I didn’t realise.
I phoned them about 4pm and would like that recorded interview accessed and listened to. Except for the bit at the end when I found out it wasn’t a dedicated line for police complaints and I had been on the main line taking up time, also that the person wasn’t going to send the complaint she had written to IPCA as well as local police – not that I trust either after the years of psychological and physical abuse I have been subjected to for my justified legal protests about abusive mental health services and others.
Last time I complained I am sure the person sent it to IPCA as well, I was expecting that to happen, I got upset with the woman on the phone, because she said it wasn’t procedure.
I don’t want to do this, I don’t want to do this, I don’t want to do this – you are never ever going to do anything – making these complaints is worse than what they are doing to me – because you never stop it, no matter how many complaints I make you never ever stop them.
I’m not sure how this is going to turn out so I apologise in advance if it is all over the place, has spelling and grammatical errors, I won’t be able to go through and check it when I am finished I will be so distressed.
A warrant was issued for my arrest Friday 1 November after me breaking my bail conditions accidently regarding seeing ????? in front of my parked car putting money in the meter and I lost it and starting singing at him.
I was told by email, although I am sure a police car came down my street to make sure I was at my home. The officer didn’t come in but the email I received from Jennifer Hansen said there was a car available to pick me from Carterton and take me to Masterton. I refused as I was looking after my daughter’s dog for the week and as police had already said they would oppose my bail I couldn’t go in as there was nobody else to care for the dog. I said I would come in Monday morning. Hansen told me to be there early in the morning. The email is available if you want proof.
On Saturday I wrote a five page letter about what happened, long hand as I have no way of printing out typed documents at the moment. It was to the Presiding Judge and a copy for duty lawyer as I knew my mental health was really bad and ability to communicate was more impaired than it had ever been. This is what I call ‘managing impairments related to my disability’, which is how I was taught to approach things when I studied disability at Massey a few years ago.
As I had been incarcerated the entire day previously and ended up flipping out at the judge because of it, I didn’t hurry to get to the police station to hand myself in. I dropped off the letters, was assured the judge and lawyer would get them then returned to my car, parked along the street back of Masterton police station. I intended to get some chalk from the boot and go chalking some poetry on the street outside court and police station. It helps me deal with the disempowered way I am treated.
When I was coming back past the back of the police station two police officers followed me and arrested me, took me back to the station and processed me. But even from when I was walking in I started not being able to speak/communicate properly, I was obviously very unwell and very distressed by what was happening. When I was put into the cell I sat on the bed for about 5 mins but I was still freaking out really badly and started to rock backwards and forwards. Then all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball in the corner of the cell on the floor so I did.
Foetal position with my hands over my face – WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME DO THIS – WHY DO YOU MAKE ME MAKE COMPLAINTS AND THEN DO NOTHING AND THINGS ONLY GET WORSE. I don’t want to remember what happened, it makes me want to kill myself I feel so despairing – all this just because I want my ACC reinstated after winning two reviews nine years ago.
Any officer that came near me I couldn’t respond to, I just cowered in the corner even more. I was there for hours. Then two officers came in and started to ask me questions, I was frozen. A male officer, who I didn’t see because my eyes were closed & my hands over my face asked me if I was awake, I couldn’t respond, he touched me and I flinched. He then said something about DHB phone call and I knew I couldn’t cope emotionally about what he was about to say so I put my fingers in my ears as strongly as I could. Putting my fingers in my ears is a common automatic response for me when I am psychologically overwhelmed.
I still couldn’t calm myself so I started involuntarily banging my head against the wall where I was sitting, which helped, I kept doing this for a long time. I peaked out from my position & couldn’t see anybody in the room so I stopped and relaxed a little. I couldn’t cry which was a really weird feeling as I was very distressed. I was numb.
I never responded to any officers the entire time I was there. I did eventually get up off the floor and walked around a bit but if I heard the buzzer of the door I immediately walked into the corner with my head away from the door and put my hands over my face. I was in the cells a long time police had other customers, men who came and went. I looked out of my cell and they waved out to me but I couldn’t speak – this is not like me I am usually ok at verbalising and last time I was in there all day I was singing and self-harming for most of it. I hit myself repeatedly and do other things to self-harm, I don’t cut myself – too scared. Anything to make the pain I feel at what happening to me not be so overwhelming.
I finally got out of the cell and two older officers that have terrorised and insulted me were there – Cunningham and Basher. I was cowering from them, I felt safer with the man in black clothes attending to me. I was moved to the court cell, which I am afraid of after a really bad experience there last year coming over in a transport vehicle having been arrested in Wellington when protesting at Human Rights Commission. I was so cold, the vehicle was so cold and the cell was so cold and I was left there for so long. Going back in there triggers me further. I had managed to be able to communicate a little more and starting singing. I was there for ages too, I saw the duty lawyer who refused to read the letter and started asking me questions. I started answering them but quickly became angry and upset and ended up screaming at her so was removed. This is similar to what happened when they kept me in the cells all day the last time. I was trying to manage my disorder so I didn’t scream at anybody, that is why I wrote the letter but she wouldn’t read it.
I finally saw the judge, almost last person for the day, I had sat in the cell for hours listening to all the names being called, waiting for my name. For years the court had been accommodating my disorder and knowing how stressed and unwell I get put me up as early as possible so I could leave and go home.
The judge had my letter all day, she already knew what she was going to decide. I did start to cry when I finally got in front of her and represented myself reasonably successfully as I didn’t have to say much more than the letter. Judge Morris knows my case well and knows all I want is to leave and go home. It only took 10-15 mins to see her. Police did oppose bail, which she ignored thank God. I did start crying in the court and was distressed when the Police lawyer prosecuting me brought over tissues – why do people who are hurting you for a job want to be nice to you, it really screws with my head when police and others do that.
When I finally got my bail forms to sign the security guard acted strangely and told the registrar lady I had been in the cells since this morning when I dropped off the letter for the judge. They looked at each other ‘knowingly’, but didn’t say anything to me about that not being OK, it was more a feeling I got over the days following. I didn’t tell the security guard, who I get on with and feel safe around, about how distressed I was in the cells because he doesn’t like it when I’m in that bad a state (in a caring way). He has seen me in that sort of mess (state of unwellness/trauma/stressed) before outside/inside court a couple of times.
It is deeply humiliating when I’m that terrified and traumatised I act out like that – but I try my best to think of it as part of my disability and not beat myself up even more about it. However I do often have a serious suicidal episode some time later, anything from a few days to two weeks later. As I get no services, am terrified of mental health almost as much as police and have nobody to talk to who is capable of supporting me, I go through those horrendous things alone at home. Complex PTSD has a 60% mortality rate because of suicide and I know it is a life and death situation for me every time I go through. I still don’t know how I make it and I do know it traumatises me more because it is like experiencing your best friend trying to kill you and put you out of your misery. You so desperately want to die because you can’t get help or justice you know you need – and from what you read, you are entitled to.
Police know what happens, they know how suicidal I am, they know what distresses me the most, they have become very good at triggering and psychologically manipulating/terrorising me. Keeping me in the cells all day is something they know causes me to flip out, which of course makes me look bad and them justified in their actions – WHICH THEY ARE NOT!
I have always maintained Wairarapa police are purposely inciting me to suicide so I don’t protest about the illegal unjust things happening to me (and other people disabled by Complex PTSD) at the hands of ACC, police and other very powerful cruel corrupt immoral people. I know from my own past experience and what other Wairarapa people have told me police here are really mean to suicidal people, which I am sure contributes significantly to Wairarapa having highest rate of suicide in New Zealand & highest rate of self-harm in the OECD.
Also the complaints from ????? about violating my bail conditions were full of lies about what happened. Police said I approached him, which I definitely did not. Both of us were surprised when I looked up and he was right in front of my car. Note: there are angle parks with one central metre for about 10 of them. I only opened my car door and stood there singing with one arm on car roof and one on the door, for less than 30 seconds.
I emailed Jennifer Hansen the next day asking for the CCTV footage because I was thinking about the security guard comment to the court registrar. It can’t have been right that I was kept there all day, especially in the extremely traumatised state I was in. Felt if a doctor or psychiatrist had seen the situation he would not have allowed police to interrogate me further about other charges. People extremely traumatised who have Complex PTSD have to be in a less distressed state to be able to even answer questions and not to be traumatised further.
I DON’T WANT TO WRITE THIS, WHY DO YOU MAKE ME DO THIS ALL THE TIME AND NEVER HELP ME, NEVER DO ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME, NEVER MAKE IT STOP. Those violent assaults you ignored, those two officers who lied in court, the one who threatened me with seeing how bad police could be if I kept protesting – you never did anything. The assault with handcuffs that has left me permanently damaged you never even asked her to apologise, which is why I wear my wrist brace whenever I protest or have to see police for anything.
When they were thoroughly searching me before they put me in the cell on Monday the two woman asked me to take it off, at which I flinched and backed into the corner of the fingerprint room – they knew why. I did take it off and show it to them. They even said they knew I didn’t like being touched – which I don’t – few, if any, persecuted abuse victims with Complex PTSD do.
I emailed Jennifer Hansen the next day – did I say that above? Asked for the footage, complained about being kept in the cells all day in the state I was. I also asked about what the two officers who came into the cell actually said because I couldn’t hear them with my fingers in my ears as tightly as they were & banging my head against the wall. It was two more complaints, one of them was a blatant lie by one woman saying I had threatened to get people to come and hurt her – which is a blatant lie. It is a fundamental principle of mine that God or Karma is the one to dish out punishment – NOT ME. I would not threaten it or for anybody else to do it EVER. I do hope the bad things happening to me and other terrorised impoverished abuse victims in New Zealand happen to these people. Because I know what they do is going to hurt an innocent poor person, but that appears acceptable to our government at the moment, no matter what Jacinda Ardern says publicly.
Now police have got people telling lies or they are on their behalf????? It is very distressing, nobody believes anything I say due to bigotry, hatred, false statements by health ‘professionals’ & being discredited by public mental health services, police etc. This is the experience of majority of mentally injured abuse victims and certain mentally ill people in Wairarapa that I have met – usually protesting in the street.
Jennifer Hansen said I will be charged with the further two charges when I go to court on 18 November. I did refute the allegations about threatening harm vehemently by email.
It might be relevant to have the letter I gave to the judge on Monday morning but it is handwritten and I have reached then end of my ability to cope and need to get this complaint sent. I can’t stop crying…………………… Please make them stop, please I am begging you, as I have begged you before, but you never did anything. Wellington police were never as bad as Wairarapa have been……………………….. I am exhausted
(It has been very difficult sharing this with everybody, because I am terrified someone will call the police ‘concerned for my welfare’ and they will just hurt me more.)
Civil Society Activist
PS I hope the Red Cross and Wairarapa DHB are happy with the cruel and unjust treatment I received from police because of their complaints. I’m sure they’d be happy if I killed myself too – just like my brother. ANOMIE in action.